Comments for Family Feeding Dynamics http://familyfeedingdynamics.com Bringing Peace and Joy to Your Family Table Mon, 13 Feb 2012 14:58:42 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 Comment on “Just don’t bring it into the house!” Stupid things experts say #5 by katja http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2011/10/03/just-dont-bring-it-into-the-house-stupid-things-experts-say-5/#comment-6056 katja Mon, 13 Feb 2012 14:58:42 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3053#comment-6056 What an amazing comment. Thank you for your insights. One thing that worries me is the kids preaching to other kids aspect that I am seeing in school nutrition programs aimed at "childhood obesity." (I think of all this in very militaristic terms. I see it like putting a shotgun with buckshot into the hands of children, when they are encouraged to educate their peers about "healthy" foods... Just a bad idea all around.) Thanks again, and I hope you keep chiming in! We're moving the blog to The Feeding Doctor! What an amazing comment. Thank you for your insights. One thing that worries me is the kids preaching to other kids aspect that I am seeing in school nutrition programs aimed at “childhood obesity.” (I think of all this in very militaristic terms. I see it like putting a shotgun with buckshot into the hands of children, when they are encouraged to educate their peers about “healthy” foods… Just a bad idea all around.)
Thanks again, and I hope you keep chiming in! We’re moving the blog to The Feeding Doctor!

]]> Comment on “Just don’t bring it into the house!” Stupid things experts say #5 by CheckeredFoxglove http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2011/10/03/just-dont-bring-it-into-the-house-stupid-things-experts-say-5/#comment-6055 CheckeredFoxglove Mon, 13 Feb 2012 14:35:37 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3053#comment-6055 This is... a bit late, but in case you're still interested in answers to your question, I've got one. My appetite never really gave up when I was restricted from things (mostly soda and potato chips), but my you're-a-good-person voice got pretty darn loud. You know how ascetics only feel good about themselves when their bodies feel terrible? I'm pretty much like that. So, when I'm sitting there wanting something, and then I don't give in, I feel safe, powerful, and virtuous. Those things feel so good that I almost always manage to resist. (Oh, and when I was a kid, I was a proselytizer about it, too. I really wonder sometimes why I ever had any friends...) Of course, this means that I have intermittent, fairly serious problems with disordered eating. For me, restriction worked to get me to stop eating the "bad" foods--and everything else. The "doctors and other 'experts'" should perhaps consider this before advising restriction. This is… a bit late, but in case you’re still interested in answers to your question, I’ve got one.

My appetite never really gave up when I was restricted from things (mostly soda and potato chips), but my you’re-a-good-person voice got pretty darn loud. You know how ascetics only feel good about themselves when their bodies feel terrible? I’m pretty much like that. So, when I’m sitting there wanting something, and then I don’t give in, I feel safe, powerful, and virtuous. Those things feel so good that I almost always manage to resist. (Oh, and when I was a kid, I was a proselytizer about it, too. I really wonder sometimes why I ever had any friends…)

Of course, this means that I have intermittent, fairly serious problems with disordered eating. For me, restriction worked to get me to stop eating the “bad” foods–and everything else. The “doctors and other ‘experts’” should perhaps consider this before advising restriction.

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by katja http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6052 katja Sat, 11 Feb 2012 15:06:57 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6052 I'm glad it is working for your family. We will have to agree to disagree. In my opinion and when I work with clients, the nutrition talk is static that makes it harder for kids to pay attention. Why not let kids find out that eating too much sugar, and not balance makes them feel bad? I have seen my daughter leave half a bag of chips, or say at age five, "I've had enough sweet for today, I'll save that chocolate for tomorrow." It also depends on each child and their temperament. A stubborn, independent child who likes to fight for control may be more likely to seek out those foods just to make a point. I've seen it. If there are "sometimes" foods, then we as the parent serve it "sometimes." As M gets older and is in more of a position to make the choices on her own, and closer to the "age of reason" that's when I'll have some of these conversations. There is a great addendum in Secrets of Feeding a healthy family about when and how to talk to kids in ways that are age-appropriate. But, what you are doing is working for you, so keep it up. I'm just saying, it has the potential to backfire and do harm. Children prone to anxiety, or with a family history of eating disorders (which have a genetic component) need to be protected from this nutrition talk in my experience. Nothing sadder than seeing a five year old having panic attacks because the food has "poison" in it, or it's "processed." I imagine we actually agree on more than we disagree on, but it's too easy to mess things up with small kids, again each child is different. And we do agree, that parents, not schools should be choosing the right time to talk about this stuff with their own kids. I do talk about "long" and "short" energy, when I include protein and fat while snack and meal planning, but that's about it. When M only eats a few pieces of candy for snack (a few times a year we have candy snacks) and is hungry soon after, she is learning a lesson that is far more powerful than words... When I talk about "healthy" foods, it is much more than nutrition, the key is attitude. The "good" and "bad" dichotomy invites static, and the headgame which for many, many people makes eating worse, not better. Thank you so much for writing in! I’m glad it is working for your family. We will have to agree to disagree. In my opinion and when I work with clients, the nutrition talk is static that makes it harder for kids to pay attention. Why not let kids find out that eating too much sugar, and not balance makes them feel bad? I have seen my daughter leave half a bag of chips, or say at age five, “I’ve had enough sweet for today, I’ll save that chocolate for tomorrow.” It also depends on each child and their temperament. A stubborn, independent child who likes to fight for control may be more likely to seek out those foods just to make a point. I’ve seen it. If there are “sometimes” foods, then we as the parent serve it “sometimes.” As M gets older and is in more of a position to make the choices on her own, and closer to the “age of reason” that’s when I’ll have some of these conversations. There is a great addendum in Secrets of Feeding a healthy family about when and how to talk to kids in ways that are age-appropriate.
But, what you are doing is working for you, so keep it up. I’m just saying, it has the potential to backfire and do harm. Children prone to anxiety, or with a family history of eating disorders (which have a genetic component) need to be protected from this nutrition talk in my experience. Nothing sadder than seeing a five year old having panic attacks because the food has “poison” in it, or it’s “processed.”
I imagine we actually agree on more than we disagree on, but it’s too easy to mess things up with small kids, again each child is different. And we do agree, that parents, not schools should be choosing the right time to talk about this stuff with their own kids. I do talk about “long” and “short” energy, when I include protein and fat while snack and meal planning, but that’s about it. When M only eats a few pieces of candy for snack (a few times a year we have candy snacks) and is hungry soon after, she is learning a lesson that is far more powerful than words…
When I talk about “healthy” foods, it is much more than nutrition, the key is attitude. The “good” and “bad” dichotomy invites static, and the headgame which for many, many people makes eating worse, not better.
Thank you so much for writing in!

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by Katie http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6051 Katie Sat, 11 Feb 2012 02:52:06 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6051 While I don't think we should talk with our children about weight or dieting I DO think kids need to know about nutrition. Maybe 100 years ago when there wasn't so much junk around this wouldn't be necessary. But, today, in this kind of food environment? You really want your kids to think they should just eat what tastes yummy and that ALL foods are healthy in some way? That's absurd. There are more foods out there that are completely devoid of nutrition and detrimental to health than there are healthy foods. Just because a food will sustain life and not make you immediately ill does NOT mean it is healthy in some way. Kids are smart enough to learn this and doesn't mean they're going to spiral out of control and start feeling guilty or restricting food or overconsuming the "bad" foods. They can handle this information and not lose their little minds as long as it's presented in the right way. But, it needs to be taught (by parents preferably). I teach my little girls that some foods are healthy and make them strong and smart and these are the foods that we eat most of the time. I also tell them which foods are not very healthy and are only "sometimes foods". I tell them that if they ate those foods too much they wouldn't feel very good but it's okay to eat them sometimes(They are 4 so this is age appropriate and not too in depth). And you know what? They get it and they're fine with it! The last thing anyone wants to do is make their children neurotic over food but completely ignoring that there are differences in the foods available to us is irresponsible...at best. While I don’t think we should talk with our children about weight or dieting I DO think kids need to know about nutrition. Maybe 100 years ago when there wasn’t so much junk around this wouldn’t be necessary. But, today, in this kind of food environment? You really want your kids to think they should just eat what tastes yummy and that ALL foods are healthy in some way? That’s absurd. There are more foods out there that are completely devoid of nutrition and detrimental to health than there are healthy foods. Just because a food will sustain life and not make you immediately ill does NOT mean it is healthy in some way. Kids are smart enough to learn this and doesn’t mean they’re going to spiral out of control and start feeling guilty or restricting food or overconsuming the “bad” foods. They can handle this information and not lose their little minds as long as it’s presented in the right way. But, it needs to be taught (by parents preferably). I teach my little girls that some foods are healthy and make them strong and smart and these are the foods that we eat most of the time. I also tell them which foods are not very healthy and are only “sometimes foods”. I tell them that if they ate those foods too much they wouldn’t feel very good but it’s okay to eat them sometimes(They are 4 so this is age appropriate and not too in depth). And you know what? They get it and they’re fine with it! The last thing anyone wants to do is make their children neurotic over food but completely ignoring that there are differences in the foods available to us is irresponsible…at best.

]]> Comment on a little sugar goes a long way by Janie http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2011/05/02/a-little-sugar-goes-a-long-way/#comment-6050 Janie Sat, 11 Feb 2012 00:29:26 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=2534#comment-6050 I'd add a bit of honey to veggies when I cook them and my little ones eat them right up!! My friend was shocked = she couldn't get her boy to eat anything but chicken nuggets LOL I’d add a bit of honey to veggies when I cook them and my little ones eat them right up!! My friend was shocked = she couldn’t get her boy to eat anything but chicken nuggets LOL

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by Amber http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6048 Amber Fri, 10 Feb 2012 09:25:24 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6048 That works for the kids until the schools institute a "Closed Campus" like they had in my school. No more going off campus to get food they want to eat instead of what the school dictates is good for them. And you know, maybe it is healthier, but... quinoa and black beans? All I can say is BLECH! That works for the kids until the schools institute a “Closed Campus” like they had in my school. No more going off campus to get food they want to eat instead of what the school dictates is good for them.

And you know, maybe it is healthier, but… quinoa and black beans? All I can say is BLECH!

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by Julie http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6045 Julie Thu, 09 Feb 2012 22:08:25 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6045 I am with you all the way on this nutrition nonsense to kids. I also predict all this teaching nutrition to kids is going to backfire. Case in point, look at the Los Angeles District schools. They developed such entrees featuring quinoa, black beans etc. (Not that I have anything against quinoa. In fact, I love it.) The kids are boycotting the school meals to go to fast food outlets. I long for a day when tasty meals....even "inorganic" meals....even with cupcakes with a mountain of frosting for desert are enjoyed by all! I am with you all the way on this nutrition nonsense to kids. I also predict all this teaching nutrition to kids is going to backfire. Case in point, look at the Los Angeles District schools. They developed such entrees featuring quinoa, black beans etc. (Not that I have anything against quinoa. In fact, I love it.) The kids are boycotting the school meals to go to fast food outlets. I long for a day when tasty meals….even “inorganic” meals….even with cupcakes with a mountain of frosting for desert are enjoyed by all!

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by katja http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6043 katja Thu, 09 Feb 2012 20:00:53 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6043 it all introduces such unnecessary worry and noise in how they feel about food and their bodies... it all introduces such unnecessary worry and noise in how they feel about food and their bodies…

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by Dominique http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6042 Dominique Thu, 09 Feb 2012 19:56:56 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6042 I don't have kids yet, however it makes me really angry that this kind of discourse is shoved down their throats EVERY SINGLE DAY. How can they trust their body if all they hear is how it is dangerous to do so? And sometimes I feel they worry and know way too much. How can my little 9 years-old cousin ask me about «aspartame»? If I think that it makes you fat or not? I mean... what's that!!! I'm a 26-year-old woman who doesn't know shizz about the incidence of artificial sweeteners, and some kid comes to me with seemingly what is an OPINION about it? Gee... I don’t have kids yet, however it makes me really angry that this kind of discourse is shoved down their throats EVERY SINGLE DAY. How can they trust their body if all they hear is how it is dangerous to do so? And sometimes I feel they worry and know way too much.

How can my little 9 years-old cousin ask me about «aspartame»? If I think that it makes you fat or not? I mean… what’s that!!! I’m a 26-year-old woman who doesn’t know shizz about the incidence of artificial sweeteners, and some kid comes to me with seemingly what is an OPINION about it? Gee…

]]> Comment on kids and nutrition talk #4, “frosting nutriency…” by hayley http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/blog/2012/02/09/kids-and-nutrition-talk-4-frosting-nutriency/#comment-6041 hayley Thu, 09 Feb 2012 19:50:10 +0000 http://familyfeedingdynamics.com/?p=3372#comment-6041 I know!! And at the grocery store I'm always looking over my shoulder to see who's at the store at what they would disapprove of in my cart! I know!! And at the grocery store I’m always looking over my shoulder to see who’s at the store at what they would disapprove of in my cart!

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